Why the green movement sucks. Or: Fuck you, Hippies!

So, as a civic minded individual, I feel that it is my duty to bring to light all the social ill's of todays society. Today, I shall tackle one of the worst: Hippies, and their so called "green movements". Now, I know what your thinking. "But X, we have to protect our enviroment! What would all our baby lemurs do without pristine forests, cool clean rivers, and the occasional starbucks staffed with hot lemur bitches?"

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not one to advocate going out into the forests, flipping Smokey the finger, then setting forest fires while drinking a six pack and listening to the musical stylings of ICP. I mean, some of my best friends are Lemurs, and they have to be able to get some lemur booty now and then. But there comes a point when enviromentalism gets complety out of hand. To this effect, I give you exhibit "A".

Now, go ahead and watch that clip. Don't worry, it's okay, I can wait. No, no, it's allright, I wont be mad. Just make sure you watch it, rather then going off and reading Cracked.com. Go on, watch!

Okay, now that you've watched that highly informative video, I'm sure you can see my point. That's right, folks. The Megazord, the most dangerous and ass kicking giant robot of it's time, was defeated... BECAUSE IT RAN OUT OF SOLAR POWER. Now, I don't know about you folks, but at what point would any sane person put Solar Cells on a giant, alien ass beating robot of humanity saving goodness? But noooooo, rather then hooking that bad boy up with some Plutonium, Chemical X, Energon, or some other futuristic energy shit, Zordon lets some damn enviromentalists bully him into putting some Solar Cells on the Megazord, and the first time there is a Solar Eclipse, it gets beat down like a red headed stepchild meeting Bing Crosby.

So fuck you, hippies. It's reasons like this which is why we are going to get our asses kicked by the Decepticons in World War III.